We were sitting at the tables in the front while I fed RC and RS munched on some snacks. When she was done, I put her back into her car seat (in the front part of the cart) and turned around to grab RS and put him in the buggy as well. While picking him up, she squirmed out and fell head-first with her car seat on top of her.
To say I was in a total state of shock is an understatement. Immediately, I picked her up--accidentally dropping RS as well while trying to get her. I was crying and holding her and so thankful that she was crying--at least she didn't die. I wanted to bring her to the ER, but someone said not to as "she might not make the car ride"--whoa, she still might die.
The ambulance gets there and we load up and off we go to the hospital. At this point, I am as upset as I have ever been in my lifetime. Consumed with guilt because I didn't buckle her in. I was trying to pretend that everything was ok because I didn't want to upset RS more than he already was. The scene looked something like this: Me turning my head having a total melt-down with tears and snot streaming down my face. . .Wiping everything away and turning to RS saying "isn't this so much fun! You are getting to ride in an ambulance whoao, whoao, whoao", then being ok for a few seconds then it hitting me again and total meltdown. Repeat, etc.
As if this isn't enough of the worst-day-of-my-life-ever, the driver who was going 100 mph started texting. Not only was my baby going to die, but so would my other baby and me!!!
"Please tell him to stop texting while he is driving 100 miles per hour with me and my kids in this car!" I tell the guy sitting in the back with as much control as I could muster.
He didn't acknowledge that I had said anything, but he did go to the hole and say something to the driver. After that, no more texting.
Now back to worrying about if I had killed my daughter. Meltdown.
We get to the ER and initially they thought that she may have broken her collar bone, but ruled that out later. The Dr. let me know that she would be sore for a while and to watch her carefully, but that she is perfectly fine.
A few pictures from the hospital
Whew, right? Not really, because now that I wasn't worrying about if she was going to die, I could really focus on how stupid I was for not buckling her into the seat before I turned around. Meltdown. This went on throughout the night and the next day.
I went to her Dr. for a follow up the next day and went through what happened with her. Meltdown.
She assured me that she was perfectly fine. "She has already forgotten about the fall and you need to too," she said.
I still have moments of painful regret and I know that I will never forget that day, but I have been able to continue living closer to "normal" lately.
Poor things (her & you!). You are a great mother, so try not to let the guilt eat you up. Like the doctor said, she has forgotten & thinks you are awesome! BTW - she looks adorable even in her hospital gown :)
ReplyDeleteYou're a great mommy!!!! Thank God all is well....ditto on the hospital gown....She's probably saying, "mommy, that roller coaster ride was fun!" :)
ReplyDeleteLove you all.